By Dr Nicola Carroll, Research Associate - The FACT Project
As the UK reaches the anniversary of its first national lockdown, parents are all too aware of pressures in caring for children amidst school closures, home-working and social distancing. 2.9 million of these parents are in single parent households. In this blog we draw attention to their experiences as reported in our digital ethnographic project in the UK.
This blog draws on data from seven single parents who are taking part in the UK project, all of whom are mothers. This reflects wider statistics on single parents - almost ninety percent of whom are women (ONS, 2019). Financial hardships among single parent families prior to Covid-19 have been well documented (JRF, 2020), and are also reflected in our study with four of these families earning less than £16,000 a year. Variations in income and other circumstances such as employment status and paternal involvement obviously affect lockdown experiences among the single mothers in the sample, with some dealing with desperate situations with limited resources and little or no support.
Financial inequalities
Statistics show single parents have been affected more harshly than couples by furlough, job losses and income cuts during the crisis, and their use of foodbanks has increased (Learning and Work Institute, 2020). This was reinforced through qualitative findings from our project. Most of the single mothers in the sample are self-employed or reliant on state benefits. For example, one mother explained that she is not eligible for state furlough, despite losing her earnings, as she was not self-employed for a sufficient period prior to Covid-19. She has had to borrow money from relatives to provide lunches for children during school closures, who previously ate free school meals.
Material resources at mothers’ disposal inevitably influence their capacity to educate and entertain their offspring during lockdown. Whereas dual-earner parents were aware of advantages in having large houses and gardens, most single mothers participating in the project live in overcrowded accommodation without private outdoor space. One mother of three spoke of having ‘nowhere for them to release their energy’ in a two-bedroom flat with no garden. Inequalities were apparent in access to on-line educational resources as well as space for schoolwork. Another mother was especially worried that her children were falling behind their peers as she did not have WiFi needed to connect laptops loaned from the school. Although two single mothers in full-time employment were relatively well-resourced, they remained concerned over job security and rising costs of basic items since the pandemic as sole earners.
Balancing competing demands
Challenges commonly faced by single parents in balancing employment, childcare and housework are also well documented (Carroll, 2018). These have been exacerbated during lockdown, as summed up by the single mother of a five-year old daughter:
A lot of families are trying to get by with significantly reduced income, social interaction, and education/childcare provision, and no respite from having children at home all the time, needing the time and attention, food, comfort, keeping entertained etc. that's usually shared among a number of adults. Even where there is only one parent, often there is childcare, grandparents, nursery/school.
Orchid Mum[1]
In responding to such challenges, mothers worked creatively to access support. In one case, a participant’s own mother moved in to form a ‘household’ and provide help with childcare and housework that enabled her to work from home. In another, a babysitter was employed on a regular basis, though this was at the time against social-distancing rules. Relaxation of restrictions to allow single parents to use support ‘bubbles’ for childcare was welcomed, but relatives lived too far away to help in most cases. Additional responsibilities appeared to be taking their toll physically and mentally on single mothers, who reported feeling ‘exhausted’, ‘stressed’ and ‘depressed’. According to Kiwi Mum, whose son has special needs: ‘Since lockdown began my domestic duties have increased over 100% and as a single parent it was all down to me anyway.’ The strain of living alone with her three-year old son was apparent from this mother’s comments:
I am freelance and if I don't work I can't pay rent… He gets frustrated at me working and has started sitting on my hands to stop me… To have to cope with more housework and more childcare on top of the same or more work has been exhausting…[feeling] isolated, anxious, lonely, scared… I think mental health has been massively impacted.
Damson Mum
Feeling solely responsible
In addition to intensification of challenges in balancing worker and caregiver roles, single mothers described very specific practical problems and anxieties in being the sole adult responsible for a family during a pandemic. Quince Mum described her struggles in keeping on top of her high workload, while also attending to her daughter’s schooling, with little to no support from the father (see photo of her work desk). Moreover, comments on being unable to leave the house were common. Shopping for groceries and accessing medical and other services was a concern among those with young children who cannot be left alone. Elderberry Mum, a mother of three sons who suffers from depression, had found lockdown especially harrowing with a new baby, a very low income and no support. She was highly fearful of herself or her children contracting the virus yet adhering carefully to social distancing left her unable to access clinical and support services. Food shortages and price increases, combined with difficulties taking three children out shopping, meant she ‘skipped meals’ and saw her children go hungry during the initial weeks of lockdown:
I really suffered for about three weeks. No food… we're rationing until social worker was able to come [and] refer me to some services that start bringing food in.
Elderberry Mum
Single mothers told of being particularly anxious about contracting Coronavirus as the sole adult in their household. Damson Mum believed her child had picked up on her anxiety: ‘He sometimes gets worried about me coughing and worried I'm going to get sick.’ Additional concerns among single mothers included one woman’s anxiety about her children’s potential exposure to risk when visiting their father, who lives in a shared house.
Positives
It should be noted that, despite the difficulties described, initial data shows that parenting during Covid-19 is not all negative. Even those single mothers in the most demanding situations cited examples of happy times playing games and doing craft projects with children since schools have been closed. One mother was pleased that her daughter had learned to read and her son had learned to ride a bike during lockdown. And, although she became tearful when discussing distressing experiences referred to previously during her interview, Elderberry Mum also recalled having fun dancing with her sons using TikTok on social media. Going through the pandemic together had also strengthened the relationship with her teenage son, according to this mother:
The negative has been the way my son has been dealing with the lockdown… The positive is that by him opening up to all this I have been able to help reassure him and it’s has made us even closer than before.’
Lemon Mum
We end this blog with thanks to these amazing mothers for taking precious time to participate in our study. Your stories have been inspirational and humbling. Happy Mother’s Day.
References
Carroll, N. (2018) ‘Lone mothers’ negotiation of competing employment and parenting demands in the contemporary British context of ‘worker citizenship’’. Contemporary Perspectives in Family Research. Vol. 13. pp.24-39.
Dromey, J., Dewar, L, Finnegan, J. (2020) Tackling single parent poverty after coronavirus. Learning and Work Institute. Available at: https://learningandwork.org.uk/resources/research-and-reports/tackling-single-parent-poverty-after-coronavirus/
Joseph Rowntree Foundation (2020) UK Poverty 2019/20. Available: https://www.jrf.org.uk/report/uk-poverty-2019-20
ONS (2019). Families and Households in the UK 2019. Office for National Statistics. Available at: https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/families/bulletins/familiesandhouseholds/2019
[1] All participants have been given a pseudonym.
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